The Tribe We Choose: Understanding the Lost Before They Burn the World

Posted on July 8, 2025 by RTG

This morning, I saw the mugshots of several young individuals arrested in Texas for conspiring to kill ICE officers. And as I looked into their faces, one thought hit me hard:

Evil comes in many different packages.

Not every monster wears a mask. Some wear backpacks. Hoodies. Blank stares. And what chilled me more than the crime was the age. The youth. The fragility beneath the rage.

I stared at those mugshots longer than I probably should have. I tried to see through the hardened eyes and emotionless expressions. I imagined their lives—what homes they came from, what pain they buried, what twisted narrative wrapped itself around them until evil felt like truth.

And what I saw wasn’t just hatred.

It was emptiness. Confusion. Disconnection.

These weren’t just criminals. These were lost souls—molded not just by ideology, but by the relentless drip of media noise, online tribalism, and emotional starvation.

The Making of a Modern Extremist

There’s a formula, if we’re honest. A predictable path:

  1. Isolation. Outcast kids who feel like they don’t belong. Misunderstood. Ignored. Unseen.
  2. Influence. They find a voice—often online—that tells them, “You’re right to be angry.” “It’s not your fault.” “They are the enemy.”
  3. Ideology. That voice gives them a cause. Something to fight against. Someone to blame.
  4. Tribe. They join others who feel the same. And suddenly, they’re no longer alone. They have purpose—even if it’s twisted.

What they lack in real identity, they find in manufactured purpose. And the scariest part? It only takes one charismatic manipulator—a digital-age Charles Manson—to light the match.

Where Do We Go From Here?

We can’t just lock them up and move on. Because if we don’t understand what creates them, more will rise.

Here’s what we need:

1. See the Invisible.

Start noticing the quiet ones. The angry ones. The “weird” ones. They’re often not dangerous—but they are vulnerable. When someone is drifting, even a little attention can change their trajectory.

2. Talk to Your Kids—More Than You Think You Should.

Ask them what they’re seeing online. What they’re feeling about the world. Who they follow. Who they believe in. If you don’t fill their emotional cup, someone else will—and they might not have good intentions.

3. Reclaim the Narrative.

The media has a voice—but so do we. Use your platforms—whether it’s a podcast, a classroom, or your dinner table—to speak truth, compassion, and critical thinking into the chaos.

4. Build Better Tribes.

Humans will always seek belonging. So let’s give them better options. Mentorship programs. Creative outlets. Faith communities. Sports. Music. Purpose.

When we offer healthy tribes, we outcompete toxic ones.

Final Thought:

We live in a world where lost hearts are being recruited before they even know who they are. If we want to stop the next fire before it burns through lives, we need to do more than react—we need to reach.

Look closer. Listen longer. Love louder.

Because the tribe they choose tomorrow might depend on the compassion we show today.

Want to help build better tribes in your community? Reach out. Let’s talk. Let’s act. Let’s stop the fire before it starts.

—

Bob Ganzak

MotivationU: Where Fire Meets Focus

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MotivationU: The Road I’ve Never Taken…Until I Did

Posted on July 7, 2025 by RTG

I was driving back from Panama City last weekend.The GPS took me a different way home—a way I’d never gone before.Normally, I’d shut it off. Go back the way I know.But something in me said… trust it.It was dark. Raining. A long, winding two-lane road.But as the miles passed, I realized something:

I still can.

There was something about that road. Not just the pavement or the path—but what it represented.Somewhere along the way in life, I think I started to believe that maybe my best accomplishments were behind me. That I had already fired every shot. That whatever I was going to become… I had already become.

But that drive told me something different.

I didn’t quit. I didn’t turn around. I didn’t panic when the road felt unfamiliar. I handled it. And I finished it. And when I did, the impossible became the improbable…and the improbable became the incredible.

Aging Isn’t the Enemy—Perspective Is.

That drive reminded me: I still have it. My ideas are good. My instincts are sound. My experience isn’t just years on the clock—it’s wisdom on the wheel.

And I realized something even bigger…

Everybody feels old. No matter their age.

We have some milestone birthdays in our family this year, young ones…25, 40 and even 42 (Not a milestone)

And every single one of them has said something like:

“I feel like I turned a page… and now I’m running out of them.”

But the truth is—we’re all in the same boat.This is the oldest any of us has ever been. And because of that… we don’t know how to be this age yet.

That’s what makes it feel scary. Not the number. The newness.

It’s unfamiliar. It’s awkward. It’s raw. But it’s not the end.

It’s just the next turn.

A Moment of Grace.

Let me tell you one more thing before I close this out. A few days ago, I was driving to my sister’s wedding.

The GPS glitched again—took me down streets I’d never seen. We were running late. Tension was high.

Then, out of nowhere, the route turned onto a road I did know. A road I’ve traveled many times. The one that leads to my parents’ gravesite. That wasn’t the planned route. It wasn’t efficient.

But man, was it perfect.

Like the world pressed pause…

just long enough for me to say, “Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. I’m on my way to watch love continue. Just thought you’d like to know.”

Closing Thought:

Sometimes the road looks wrong, but it’s exactly right. Sometimes the path feels unfamiliar, but it leads you exactly where you’re supposed to go. And sometimes, just when you think it’s over, you’re reminded… You still can. Keep driving, Even when the road is dark. Even when the GPS reroutes. Even when you’ve never been that way before.

Because the road isn’t behind you.

It’s still under your feet.

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 Buc-ee’s, Kings, and the Battle for Our Attention

Posted on June 16, 2025 by RTG

It’s amazing what people let bother them these days.

A friend posted something today criticizing Buc-ee’s—a quirky and beloved roadside stop for many travelers. He called it “a Walmart with a gas pump,” clearly unimpressed. But what struck me wasn’t his take—it was the energy it took to even care. If you don’t like Buc-ee’s… don’t go. That’s the beauty of personal choice.

But his jab wasn’t really about a convenience store. I think it was aimed at something bigger—capitalism, consumerism, or maybe just the cultural noise of the moment. And that’s what we’re all getting swept into: a culture of constant opinion-sharing and outrage, often about things that, in the grand scheme of life, don’t matter.

Take, for example, the recent protests on “Kings Day.” Some claimed it was a reaction to Trump supposedly calling himself a king. But he never said that. It doesn’t matter though—the narrative had already taken off, media outlets picked it up, emotions got high, and once again we had anger in the streets.

It’s a pattern:

  1. Someone proposes a fringe idea.
  2. The media gives it oxygen.
  3. People, already stirred up, take sides.
  4. A spark hits the powder keg—and now we’re dealing with real violence.

We’ve seen it again and again: shootings, looting, deepening division.

All for what?

Here’s a radical thought: What if people just focused on their own lives, their own actions, and the way they treat others? What if we stopped inserting our outrage into everything? If we spent less time being bothered by Buc-ee’s, less time crafting clever insults about people we’ll never meet, and more time being present for our families, our work, and our communities… wouldn’t that be a better use of our energy?

We don’t need to silence people. But we could all benefit from a little intentional quiet. A little grace. A little restraint. Not every opinion needs a podium. Not every disagreement needs a battle.

Maybe the peace we want in the world starts with the peace we choose in our own hearts.

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The Cost of Contempt

Posted on June 10, 2025 by RTG

Why Disagreeing Shouldn’t Mean Dehumanizing

We’ve all felt it—that tension when politics comes up. But today, it’s more than discomfort. It’s contempt. Somewhere along the way, we’ve stopped trying to understand one another and started trying to win at all costs. And in doing so, we’re losing something far more valuable.

Disagreement Isn’t the Problem—Contempt Is

When one group riots, it’s called “peaceful protest.” When someone on the other side merely speaks up, they’re labeled, silenced, or attacked. This kind of selective outrage doesn’t lead to justice—it leads to deeper division.

Hatred is hatred. It doesn’t change based on who’s doing it or who it’s aimed at. If we keep excusing behavior on “our side” while condemning it on “the other,” we’ve abandoned fairness altogether.

Violence Has No Place—Ever

Let’s be absolutely clear:

Violence should never be a part of debate or free speech—

in no shape, no form, and under no justification.

It doesn’t matter who’s doing it or what cause they claim—it is always wrong.

Words are not weapons. Convictions are not clubs. And disagreement, no matter how passionate, is never a justification for destruction.

You don’t get to burn cities because you’re angry.

You don’t get to threaten lives because you feel unheard.

You don’t get to silence others with fists or fire.

The right to speak must never include the right to harm.

If we allow violence to creep into our discourse—even a little—we lose not just civility, but freedom itself.

What We’re Losing

We’ve seen this imbalance grow over the past 60 years—and today, it’s louder and more accepted. Free speech isn’t free if it only applies to certain opinions. Respect isn’t real if it’s only shown to those who agree with us.

A strong democracy doesn’t just allow for opposing voices—it requires them.

Debate sharpens us. Listening humbles us. And both are necessary for a healthy society.

Here’s the Challenge

  • Call out hatred, no matter where it comes from.
  • Protect speech, even when it’s uncomfortable.
  • Condemn violence—clearly, consistently, and without exception.
  • Disagree with decency, not destruction.
  • Listen—not to convert, but to understand.

A Better Way Forward

America was never built on uniformity. It was built on freedom. And freedom means learning to live, speak, and work alongside those who see the world differently.

We won’t fix division overnight. But we can refuse to fuel it.

We can choose respect over ridicule, fairness over fury.

Let’s be the kind of people who disagree without destroying—who speak truth without spite. That’s how change really begins.

Join the Conversation

If this message resonates with you, share it.

Leave a comment.

Start a conversation rooted in conviction—not contempt.

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The Rainy Days I Miss The Most

Posted on June 9, 2025 by RTG

There was a time in my life when a rainy day felt like a curse.

Now, I realize it was a gift.

The Boredom I Couldn’t Wait to Escape

When I was young—maybe twelve or thirteen—rainy days felt endless. I’d sit by the window, watching drops snake their way down the glass, wondering when the sky would clear and let me do something. Anything.

Stuck inside, hours felt like days. The TV offered nothing new. The same books sat on the shelf, already read, and the clock hands barely moved. I’d flop on the couch, pace the hall, open the fridge a dozen times hoping something interesting had appeared.

I didn’t know it then, but I was living through some of the richest moments of my life.

The Stillness I Now Crave

Today, I’d give anything to go back.

Not to change anything—just to be there again.

To hear the soft murmur of a television in the next room. To feel the warmth of dry socks and smell grilled cheese sizzling on a rainy afternoon. To lie on my bed, staring at the ceiling, free of deadlines, free of expectations, free of the mental weight that adulthood brings.

What I once saw as boring, I now see as sacred.

Because those days were slow. Unhurried. Undemanding. There was no pressure to prove anything. No constant feed of information. No overwhelming noise of the world. Just a quiet kind of peace I didn’t appreciate when I had it.

The Gift of Remembering

Rainy days now mean traffic, delays, and soggy shoes. But every once in a while, when the world slows just enough, I’ll catch a glimpse of those long-ago afternoons.

And I’ll miss them.

Not out of sadness, but gratitude. Because they remind me that life’s richest moments are often the ones we don’t notice while they’re happening.

So the next time the rain comes and the world presses pause—maybe don’t rush to fill the space.

Maybe just listen.

There might be something sacred in the stillness.

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Thoughts On A Sunday Night

Posted on July 16, 2023 by RTG

July 16, 2023 and I am watching the sun go down in our backyard in Georgia. Summer seems to be cruising by and there is no way to slow it down. When up pops a stream of thought that just might be readable. I guess we will find out when I am finished.

Seven billion people on this planet and one sun. It makes me realize that we are all a part of something larger than just our backyard, our job or even our country. To me that brings hope, hope that one day we all realize that being human is a thread of being on the same team. Sure, we all have differences, I just said, hope.

Greed is a sad thing, a sad place to be. I think that it one of the places where we fall off a bit, when greed overtakes a persons life, the human side of them can falter. One thing I know is that we can all get better, at whatever we do or whoever we are, we can get better.

In every one of our Dale Carnegie Programs in which I am the instructor, I tell my participants something I heard as a young athlete, you play like you practice, so practice hard. In essence, our preparation for life should be taken seriously because that is how we live. I mean by preparation, our thoughts. When you spend your energy building positive thoughts in your mind, you may have a more positive outcome.

Lets admit it, the toughest real estate to navigate is that space between our ears, our minds. It really is the first place that we allow fear and doubt to enter, both of those like to take control. Why can’t we replace that with a searing and healthy belief in ourselves? If fear and doubt can so strongly take hold of us, and that is where it begins, just work on replacing it with a strong belief in YOU.

Again, you play how you practice, we need to be diligent in our practice on believing in ourselves.

It seems like fear and doubt impact us quickly. We can be going along just so smoothly and a pang of doubt creeps in and takes over. On the other hand when we have a small little victory we justify it as luck or even something else. It would be better if we were able to celebrate those little victories, an inchworm moving closer to a positive goal. Celebrate, every bit of progress is a win and should be celebrated.

Maybe it is human nature to focus on our losses, maybe it is and maybe it isn’t. It seems that we spend more time on that, the losses. Mr. Carnegie has a principle, count your blessings not your troubles. We can grow from that in our lives, to count our wins and learn from our losses. We need to celebrate our life victories and learn from the times we fail or have a setback. Don’t allow the losses to overrun you, they are fantastic learning tools to study and then cast aside. Keep going in a positive direction.

Winning requires effort, in sports, it also requires teamwork. Surround yourself with people who lift you up and give you encouragement, that also means that you have to encourage others. Yes, you are a part of THEIR team and their journey towards success. We hear often that it is the people that we share life with that we need to choose wisely, be a person that makes someone that chooses you to have made a wise move.

Back in the 1980’s I read a book, The Seeds if Greatness by Dr. Denis Waitley. In the book he talked about the weeds that took over our garden, our minds. Things like anxiety, fear and doubt, plus many others. It prompted me to think about a pesticide, DDT. Something that was thought to be helpful turned out to be harmful and was eventually banned for agricultural use. My terminology of DDT was different.

Dedication Discipline and Tenacity.

My thought was that if we could dedicate ourselves to a purpose, a goal or a projected target, like lets say weight loss. Then we disciplined ourselves to do the things that were necessary to achieve that purpose or goal, whatever those steps were that we needed to do and attacked them with a ferocious tenacity, well we would have a better chance of making them come to fruition.

Take for instance a sales goal. Set the goal, make it reasonable and doable. Then figure out all of the actions you need to take in order to achieve it. The number of calls. The practice of your craft. Your sales pitch. The honing of your skills. All of the items needed in your sales journey. Then discipline yourself to do each one, every one and the practice that goes along with that process. The next step is to attack each one with tenacity. The learning, the doing, the time organization, prospecting, attack them with an enthusiastic tenacity.

Well, it is a thought. DDT. It is better than a half hearted effort.

Like I said an hour ago, not sure if this is readable, maybe it is and maybe it isn’t. Just thoughts that came out of my head watching the sunset on a Sunday night.

I hope that you find something positive here that you can utilize in your world. Just a bit of rambling. Thank you for reading.

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Focus on the Good: Lifting Others Up in Their Lowest Moments

Posted on June 21, 2023 by RTG

Everyone has their low moments, even us. At times, it’s easy to feel down, lonely, and helpless. In these trying times, it is crucial to support one another and find the good in others, even when it feels impossible. Today we explore ways we can help lift others up when they are at their lowest, and in turn, positively impact each other’s lives.

1. Be a Good Listener

One of the most important things we can do to help someone in their time of need is simply to listen. Offering a shoulder to lean on lets the person know they are not alone and that their feelings are valid. Make sure to actively listen, be engaged, and be present.

2. Offer Words of Encouragement

Encouraging and uplifting words can go a long way in helping someone feel better. Even simple phrases, like “You can do this” or “I believe in you,” can make a difference. Be genuine and compassionate in your responses, and remember that sometimes, it’s more about how you say it than what you say.

3. Share Positive Stories and Experiences

Everybody loves a good story. In moments of despair, it can be incredibly comforting to hear about someone else who has faced similar challenges and triumphed. Share your own experiences if you can, or even stories of inspirational figures. This can help them find hope in their situation and encourage them to keep pushing forward.

4. Suggest Practical Support

Sometimes, the most effective way to help someone is by easing their practical burdens. Offer to run errands, cook a meal, walk their dog, or just spend some quality time together. These small acts can make a significant difference in how someone feels during their low moments.

5. Celebrate Small Victories

In dark times, it’s essential to recognize and celebrate the small triumphs and victories that may otherwise be overlooked. This can help boost the person’s confidence and remind them of their own abilities and worth.

6. Encourage Self-Care and Mindfulness

When it comes to lifting someone up, it’s important not to forget about self-care. Encourage the person to practice mindfulness through meditation, journaling, or taking regular breaks. Help them establish a self-care routine that works for them and aids in their emotional and mental well-being.

In Conclusion: Our Positive Impact on One Another

We all have the power to positively impact each other’s lives, even in the most challenging times. By being a good listener, offering words of encouragement, sharing positive stories, providing practical support, celebrating small victories, and encouraging self-care, we can lift up those around us who may be at their lowest. Remember, focusing on the good in others and ourselves can make a world of difference.

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Time Time Ticking

Posted on May 10, 2023 by RTG

Ticking away…Don Henley wrote “Time time ticking, ticking away.” Pink Floyd also wrote about time, “Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day…”. Jackson Browne wrote in the song The Pretender, “They say in the end its the wink of an eye”

As I sit here I was thinking how sporting events let me know also how quickly the time goes. Super Bowl time? Bye bye January. Daytona 500 completed? means good-bye to February! March? It must be the TPC in Ponte Vedra… Stay with golf, The Masters? Adios April… May will bring us the Indy 500 and on and on and on…all the way until we do it again, if we are lucky.

Time, that one commodity that we all have equal amounts of. Nobody gets 25 hours in a day or 62 seconds in a minute. One amount for all. No exceptions to THAT rule…it is what you do with it that counts. How do you balance your world of time? How do you generate all of the things you need in your time?

Most people head right to earning, money and acquiring wealth when it comes to time. I bet that was in the back of your mind when you started reading this, it actually was in the back of mine when I started writing it. Things change. Time changes us.

How much time, quality time, did you spend with your children this week? As much as you did at work? How much quality time did you spend with your parents, your siblings? Did your daughter call and you said you were too busy to talk? We all get the same amount of time, no exceptions to that rule, right? How do you utilize yours?

How much time did you spend improving your health this week? Today? Yesterday? Last month? Could you take five minutes and do 30 push ups? 5 push ups? If you did would you be better off than if you didn’t? Why? Why not?

What compels a parent to tell a child, “I don’t have time to talk”, and then goes back to watching their recorded Netflix show that they have been binge watching for five years? You can go back and watch that recorded show later, your child will only be that exact age on that day ONCE…TIME, a commodity we all share equally! I should add, in the moment, because not all of us get the same amount over a lifetime.

May 10th, 2023! Time! There was a tv show on from 1957 to 1962, The Tales of Wells Fargo, I was too young to remember it or watch it. I found it on INSP channel, and have perused a few episodes, fun and nostalgic. What startled me is to see when the first showing ran of each episode. Dates like 5/07/57 or 6/24/57…the first is 2 days after my now deceased sister Cathy had her 8th birthday. The other is 49 years to the day before I married my wife… TIME

Today I am going to think about time and how I use it. I get the same amount you do, I need to do a better job of utilizing it. To find the correct blend of work, family, health and my time. The correct blend for me, that is important, it is YOUR use of YOUR time. MY use of MY time. We all get the same amount, use it wisely!

RTG

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Changes – Options – Growth

Posted on April 16, 2023 by RTG

“In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity.”

Albert Einstein

As we wander, or wonder, through life, it can be the simple daily routines that can challenge us the most. As I read people’s pages, their blogs, hear the podcasts and talk with others, there are some very ritual daily actions that are most confounding to humans. Things like, sleep, or diet, or relationships.

In today’s reality we have so much information at our fingertips, our problem now is to believe it or not. There was a time in our life that we had to search for solutions, and there were no engines to search on. Library, asking questions of people, those were our search engines then. Either that or experimenting ourselves, trying new techniques, doing our own analysis.

Look, I will be blunt. If you cannot sleep, you are overweight or you are not coming close to fulfilling your dreams? There is not magical pill, it is called CHANGE. Why do you keep doing the same thing over and over again and expect things to change? Really? That is your reason? You have options and your growth can be in your own hands, you have to do SOMETHING and make it something different than what you have been doing…

Just look at what you do each night before bed. What do you eat? What time? Do you watch electronic visuals? Do you know what the blue light does to your sleeping? What are other people doing? How do others calm themselves? There are a ton of people out there that share their success, read and research, you can find a solution. Try something different.

This comes directly from WebMD.

“It’s safe to say most of us spend a lot of time staring at screens. And that can be bad for our eyes. Blue light from electronics is linked to problems like blurry vision, eyestrain, dry eye, macular degeneration, and cataracts. Some people have sleep issues.”

I was talking with a medical professional the other day, and they told me to try solutions for 60-90 days to see if you make progress. If you have trouble sleeping, shut off the electronics early in the evening and do that for 60-90 days, see if you get improvement.

Weight loss? Do something different. Salt, sugars, fats, fried foods, alcohol all can be a cause. I am not a doctor, nor a specialist, so my suggestions may not be the correct solution, just try something different. I stopped eating breads, curbed alcohol and changed my eating times. All of this seemed to help me. What you eat, when you eat it and how much you eat are logical changes to make or at least try. Again, not one day, try it for 60-90 days. You are worth the effort.

I have a friend over 70 that looks like he could be in his fifties, very disciplined and shares often his way of keeping young. No alcohol eats before 7 and rides his bike almost every day. He also talks about the portions that he eats, more smaller meals and healthy snacks. He too stays away from breads.

Self-discipline is a big challenge for all of us. I have some of those habits that really challenge me. Snacks like crackers and nuts are a real tough one for me, especially if I am watching a show or reading. I tell myself that this can lead to my pants being tighter, shirts not looking right or my suits getting a little tight where they should not be. I will use a week of meditation sessions everyday aimed at that bad habit, it seems to help me be more disciplined, to NOT partake in those little annoying practices.

Bottom line, if you are struggling about some issues like sleep, weight or other daily functions like these, DO NOT TALK ABOUT IT, take action, try something different and try it for 2 or 3 months. It may help, it really can’t hurt.

You can make changes, there are options, and every positive step is growth. Search Median, search Quora and do not hesitate to go to WebMD or the Mayo Clinic’s website. Like I said earlier, you are worth it!

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Morning Ramblings

Posted on April 12, 2023 by RTG

What a great way to start the day. Up early, time with Buffett, morning breakfast with coffee and time writing. Do some reading and make the day bounce into the world!

Some of the things that happen in life are not your fault, you cannot control how someone reads words you write or how they live their life…let it be, learn to walk away, you cannot change everyone…right? RIGHT! The ONLY person you can change is YOU!

I am not going to talk about any other people, who tripped my trigger does not matter. Just do you and your thing and do not worry about the rest…

Why do I write this? Because learning to manage our emotions can change our entire life. Truly. How we handle our reaction to a variety of different stimuli can make an entire life change. When we learn to control our emotions in every situation (Doable), we become a more intentional person who stays on track to their vision and goals…

DTBYC

Do The Best You Can

Always

Work to improve who you are and invest in your own growth. It does not matter what, learn something today. How to build a better power point? How to use Excel? Learn a language? Do something today to improve YOU…

Make today a wonderful day, it is how we react to what happens that guides the day.

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